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My journey continues to be full of new experiences at every turn, dark and stormy road, beautiful mountain top, and laid-back valley floor.

While I cherish every new experience and learning within my journey, I’d be a fool to say this is a pleasure cruise. For a journey of growth requires discipline and self reflection; it requires letting go of ego.

The ego has a time a place, so I’ve been told. A strong, confident, and wise ego can take you far with humility. A weak, proud, arrogant, and obnoxious one can bury your growth. My partner shared that with me many times before, and it fell on deaf ears, but now I’m listening. No matter what I seem to do, my weakness shows itself daily though. The “bad ego” visits, which isn’t bad in itself.

The most recent months, and even more in the last few weeks, I have become progressively aware of these happenings. My presence, mindfulness, and self-reflection have been keen and watchful over my behavior, my thoughts, and my actions. I attribute much of this to Thich Nhat Hanh’s The Miracle of Mindfulness, among breathing practices and all of the work I have put into this incredible transformation of myself—from daily yoga and exercise to reading and journaling.

The Miracle of Mindfulness has led me to think less and enjoy every moment, even during mundane tasks and boring or shallow conversation. I would point out that boring and shallow conversations are finding me less these days as the shift within seems to attract similar intellect and folks curious or knowledgeable about spiritual journeys toward healing themselves.

This has been refreshing as this journey has forced me to release many things that used to completely run my life and lead me toward pain and suffering. Things that no longer serve my growth. Releasing my addictions to alcohol, social media, and instant gratification have transformed my mind, body, and soul to a new environment.

Being within that environment, I now see this transformational work isn’t temporary; it may and probably will last a lifetime. If you believe in reincarnation, it could last multiple lifetimes. I chuckle at that idea, because it sounds daunting, and if someone told me I couldn’t do it, I most certainly would. A new friend reminded me of this inner spark in which to ignite your biggest fire within no matter the task.

When I started this journey, I thought to myself, “I will change overnight and everything will be good in a year.” While I have changed overnight, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually, there’s always room to grow, and I’m staying the course. From my point of view in this moment, the horizon continues to stretch beyond and will until all the lessons are learned.

I am ready and am not faltering. A river flows in one direction, but there are many paths to the sea. Fear is the only obstacle. Say hello, learn about it, tell it to piss off, and keep reaching for the stars. Be well, much love, and there’s always room to grow. Give it space and time to do so.

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