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{*Did you know you can write on Elephant? Here’s how—big changes: How to Write & Make Money or at least Be of Benefit on Elephant. ~ Waylon}

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We all have natural talents that come effortlessly to us, but not all talents are celebrated. Some go unnoticed or, worse, are dismissed as irrelevant or even problematic.

A talent can be something practical, like knowing how to kick a soccer ball to score, or more subtle, like sensing someone’s emotions without them saying a word.

Whether it’s hearing what isn’t being said in a conversation or staying calm during a heated debate, talents come in all shapes and forms—but not all are recognized or appreciated.

In fact, some of the most powerful talents are the ones people are often encouraged to suppress or abandon. The irony? These talents could make all the difference if only others understood their value. While not every quirk or behavior is useful, when it comes to the things you do naturally and exceptionally well—things others can’t quite match—it’s crucial to stand up for them. If you don’t, they might go to waste, along with valuable opportunities to contribute meaningfully.

Have you ever felt that you see or sense something others just can’t? Do you find it difficult to speak up when your talents go unnoticed? If so, you’re not alone.

Why Women, Especially, Struggle to Advocate for Their Talents

One of the greatest challenges women face is that many of our talents, like sensing and intuition, are often overlooked or dismissed. Historically, women’s voices have been ignored or silenced, and when our insights come without hard data to back them up, it’s easy for others—and even ourselves—to label them as “crazy” or irrelevant. When we sense something is wrong, it’s often brushed off as paranoia. But when our instincts prove right, it’s too late, and people find ways to explain away what was actually a valuable talent.

Here’s an example of mine:

A few months ago, my family and I moved into our dream home, but we needed to sell our old house quickly. The night before the first showing, we discovered that the front door handle wasn’t working. My husband and our realtor wanted to replace it immediately, but I saw something they didn’t.

You see, I have a talent for spotting potential problems before they unfold. It’s not a conscious thing—it’s more like an image that pops into my head, showing me what’s likely to happen if we take a certain path. I had installed that door handle myself and knew the wood around it was deteriorating. I saw that if we removed the handle, we wouldn’t be able to put a new one back on, and we wouldn’t have time to buy a new door. Showing the house with no front door handle? Not a good look.

I insisted we use the side door, which led into a beautiful mudroom. After some pushback, they agreed—because I used the steps I’m about to share with you. By the next day, we had multiple offers over the asking price. My talent for spotting problems before they happen—something that isn’t always valued—ended up being crucial to our success.

This is why it’s so important to advocate for your talents, especially when others don’t immediately see their value.

So How Do You Advocate for These Often Invisible or Misunderstood Talents?

How do you make others see what you see?

Step 1: Recognize Your Talents for What They Are

First, you have to recognize your talents yourself. Ask yourself: What do you do easily that others struggle with or don’t seem to notice? When do you feel most in your element—where time seems to disappear and you find yourself consistently successful? These are the clues to your hidden talents.

Ask those around you what they see as your natural gifts. What do people come to you for help with—organizing, problem-solving, or even knowing just the right thing to say? This outside perspective can give you insight into the talents you might not realize you have.

You can also use assessments like CliftonStrengths to help identify your natural abilities, but even with an assessment, self-reflection is key. Own the unique talents you bring to the table. Before anyone else can recognize your magic, you need to recognize it first.

Step 2: Learn to Talk About Your Talents

Talking about your talents can feel awkward, especially when they aren’t as visible or tangible as others might expect. But you need to find the right words to describe what you do well.

For example, I describe my talent for foreseeing problems as being able to “think one step ahead” or “see issues before they happen.” But it’s important to find language that resonates with both you and those around you.

Pro tip: Create a “bank” of different ways to describe your talent, and collect examples of when your talent helped solve a problem or achieve something important—just like my house story. This will help you feel more confident and articulate when it’s time to advocate for yourself.

Step 3: Link Your Talent to What Others Care About

Now, this might seem counterintuitive when you’re advocating for yourself, but understanding what the other person values is essential. Why? Because they don’t see the world through your talent; they see it through their own. You have to meet them where they are before you can show them what you see.

In my case with the front door handle, I knew my husband was worried about carrying two mortgages and was listening to our realtor, who had the authority of her job title. To get them on board, I had to see what they were focused on—quickly selling the house—and show how my solution directly addressed that concern, even if they couldn’t initially see the problem with the door.

Think of it like guiding someone’s gaze. If they’re focused on a beautiful tree in the landscape, but you want them to see the cardinal perched on a branch, you need to understand their perspective before you can redirect their attention.

Step 4: Start Small, Then Scale

If you find advocating for your talents daunting, start small. Try this: The next time you’re in a meeting, or even a casual conversation, pay attention to where your talents could add value, even in a subtle way. When the opportunity arises, speak up. The more you practice advocating for your talents, the easier it becomes—and soon, it will feel natural.

The Power of Self-Advocacy

Advocating for your talents when they go unnoticed is critical—not just for your own confidence but for the success of the family, team, business, or situation you’re trying to improve. The key is recognizing your talent first, finding the language to describe it, and linking it to what others care about. When you can master these steps, you’ll find that not only are your talents recognized, but they also start making a significant impact.

Don’t wait for validation. Take a moment today to recognize one talent you’ve been dismissing. Write down how it has helped you or others, and commit to speaking up the next time you see an opportunity to use it. Your talents are meant to be shared—don’t let them go unnoticed.

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